124 replies to this topic

[Jimmy_mac]

monty python, fantastic stuff

[Bencrest]

Is that pop corn still floating around ?

Floating is right... it is also now covered in assorted fluff and bits of blue furry stuff.

[jamesb99_1999]

I have to say --- A cardboard cut out of Pamela Anderson is better than nothing.. I'll have any going free.

[ady]

DAD's quote from a Monty Python scene I believe.....lol (PAGE 8!!!!)
ffs............I cannot understand why we all get at each other...especially now with MFME3, whats this all about we arn't bored--far from it.

Agreed, Fuit-Emu is n00b-Emu, thats not a bad thing....and yeah we do all jump on some threads for (what we think) are stupid questions....and yep we do sometimes reply bluntly, but thats forums isn't it?

But within this thread is someone that does shitloads for the scene, maybe not too obvious at times....So n00b or established--we should get facts correct first--whoever that is aimed at before we try reading the riot act.

[Jimmy_mac]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Riot_Act

just in case we do get round to reading the riot act

[Pgamblin]

DAD's quote from a Monty Python scene I believe.....lol (PAGE 8!!!!)
ffs............I cannot understand why we all get at each other.

Feck off Ady you noob, all the time you just sit around and add post's when its suits you, call yourself a moderator ?

You couldnt figure out the way out of a paperbag. as for your facination with Gwen Stiff-armi dude get a reality check.

-----
-----

And now for something completely different.



Mr Vernon: Hello, madam... (comes in)

Mrs Long Name: Ah hello... you must have come about...

Mr Vernon: Finishing the sentences, yes.

Mrs Long Name: Oh... well... perhaps you'd like to...

Mr Vernon: Come through this way... certainly... (they go through into the sitting room) Oh, nice place you've got here.

Mrs Long Name: Yes ... well ... er... we...

Mr Vernon: Like it?

Mrs Long Name: Yes ... yes we certainly...

Mr Vernon: Do... Good! Now then... when did you first start...

Mrs Long Name: ... finding it difficult to...

Mr Vernon: Finish sentences... yes.

Mrs Long Name: Well it's not me, it's my...

Mr Vernon: Husband?

Mrs Long Name: Yes. He...

Mr Vernon: Never lets you finish what you've started.

Mrs Long Name: Quite. I'm beginning to feel...

Mr Vernon: That you'll never finish a sentence again as long as you live.

Mrs Long Name: Exact...

Mr Vernon: ly. It must be awful.

Mrs Long Name: It's driving me...

Mr Vernon: To drink?

Mrs Long Name: No, rou...

Mr Vernon: nd the be...

Mrs Long Name: en.,.

Mr Vernon: d...

Mrs Long Name: Yes...

Mr Vernon: May I..,

Mrs Long Name: Take a seat...

Mr Vernon: Thank you. (he sits) You see, our method is to reassure the patient by recreating normal... er...

Mrs Long Name: Conditions?

Mr Vernon: Yes. Then we try to get them in a position where they suddenly find that they're completing other people's sentences...

Mrs Long Name: (with self-wonder) Themselves!

Mr Vernon: Spot on Mrs...

Mrs Long Name: (hesitantly) Smith?

Mr Vernon: Good! Well, try not to overdo it to...

Mrs Long Name: (with growing confidence) Begin with... ?

Mr Vernon: Good. Just keep it to one or two...

Mrs Long Name: (faster) Words ....

Mr Vernon: To start off with, otherwise you may find that you're...

Mrs Long Name: Taking on too long a sentence and getting completely ... er...

Mr Vernon: Stuck. Good. Yes. Well that's about it...

Mrs Long Name: (completely confident now) for now, so...

Mr Vernon: Thanks very much for calling.

Mrs Long Name: Not at all.

Mr Vernon: And, er...

Mrs Long Name: Just like to say

Mr Vernon: Thank you very much for coming along.

Mrs Long Name: Not at all

Mr Vernon: And good...

Mrs Long Name: Bye, Mr...

Mr Vernon: Vernon.

(Mrs Long Name leaves. Mr Vernon shuts the door. A girl's voice comes from sitting room.)

Girl's Voice: Carl?

Mr Vernon: Yes, dear?

Girl's Voice: I've just had another baby.

Mr Vernon: Oh, no! How many's that now?

Girl's Voice: Twelve since lunch... Oh! There's another one!

[ady]

pmsl..................


Glad you realised my reply.................


I didn't mention any names did I?

[Pgamblin]

spam spam and more spam

May i suggest Sir looks here
http://www.wavsource...hons_flying.htm

[DaemonX]

Feck me lordapm, I've never seen someone start so much shit without realising it, is it fair to call you a NooB tho, since you've been here 6 months lol.

I've cloned (Club Monopoly Corre Edition) it's only the sound roms thats wrong!!!, and I've created (Big Bucks Xmas Edit), admittedly, some should have been for personal use, but sometimes it's nice to see things looking different even if they play the same!!!

take a look at todays market.... there are what... 20 different types of machine, the rest are CLONES... so why can't we make some?

(Since we're on Monty.... And the Lord spake, saying, 'First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count to three. No more. No less. Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, nor either count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then, lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it.')

[Gazeyre1966]

I'm calling for a spanish inquisition into this thread. The noob that started it must think we're all stark raving mad!!!!!

[Pgamblin]

SAVE THE WHALE

[Pgamblin]

Time for jokes then

Cyber Sex gone bad

bloodninja: Ok baby, we got to hurry, I don't know how long I can keep it ready for you.

j_gurli3: thats ok. ok i'm a japanese schoolgirl, what r u.

bloodninja: A Rhinocerus. Well, hung like one, thats for sure.

j_gurli3: haha, ok lets go.

j_gurli3: i put my hand through ur hair, and kiss u on the neck.

bloodninja: I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my breeding territory.

j_gurli3: haha, ok, u know that turns me on.

j_gurli3: i start unbuttoning ur shirt.

bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't wear shirts.

j_gurli3: No, ur not really a Rhinocerus silly, it's just part of the game.

bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't play games. They f*****g charge your ass.

j_gurli3: stop, cmon be serious.

bloodninja: It doesn't get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to charge your ass.

bloodninja: I stomp my feet, the dust stirs around my tough skinned feet.

j_gurli3: thats it.

bloodninja: Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see as skulls collide and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in the air on my mighty horn.

bloodninja: Goddam am I hard now.

[Gazeyre1966]

pmsl pgamblin.

What about that stupid "save the whale, greenpeace, hairy hippy, been on the dole since 1970" prick who is trying to sue the Government because he believes "sonar signals" made the whale come up the Thames....or something like that...lol

[Pgamblin]

bloodninja: Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?
BritneySpears14: Aight.
bloodninja: Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.
BritneySpears14: I slip out of my pants, just for you, bloodninja.
bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: Oh, I like to play dress up.
bloodninja: Me too baby.
BritneySpears14: I kiss you softly on your chest.
bloodninja: I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.
BritneySpears14: Hey...
bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 Cock of the Infinite.
BritneySpears14: Funny I still don't see it.
bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty f*** of the Beyondness.
BritneySpears14: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.
bloodninja: Don't f*** with me bitch, I'm the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.
bloodninja: I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl. 2 Druid.
BritneySpears14: Don't ever message me again you piece of shit.
bloodninja: Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.
bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik's evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.
bloodninja: You still there baby? I think it's getting hard now.
bloodninja: Baby?

[Pgamblin]

BritneySpears14: Ok, are you ready?
eminemBNJA: Aight, yeah I'm ready.
BritneySpears14: I like your music Em... Tee hee.
eminemBNJA: huh huh, yeah, I make it for the ladies.
BritneySpears14: Mmm, we like it a lot. Let me show you.
BritneySpears14: I take off your pants, slowly, and massage your muscular physique.
eminemBNJA: Oh I like that Baby. I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: What the f***, I told you not to message me again.
eminemBNJA: Oh shit
BritneySpears14: I swear if you do it one more time I'm gonna report your ISP and say you were sending me kiddie porn you f*** up.
eminemBNJA: Oh shit
eminemBNJA: damn I gotta write down your names or something

[Pgamblin]

bloodninja: Wanna cyber?
DirtyKate: OK, but don't tell anybody ;-)
DirtyKate: Who are you?
bloodninja: I've got blond hair, blue eyes, I work out a lot
bloodninja: And I have a part time job delivering for Papa John's in my Geo Storm.
DirtyKate: You sound sexy.. I bet you want me in the back of your car..
bloodninja: Maybe some other time. You should call up Papa John's and make an order
DirtyKate: Haha! OK
DirtyKate: Hello! I'd like an extra-EXTRA large pizza just dripping with sauce.
bloodninja: Well, first they would say, "Hello, this is Papa John's, how may I help you", then they tell you the specials, and then you would make your order. So that's an X-Large. What toppings do you want?
DirtyKate: I want everything, baby!
bloodninja: Is this a delivery?
DirtyKate: Umm...Yes
DirtyKate: So you're bringing the pizza to my house now? Cause I'm home alone... and I think I'll take a shower...
bloodninja: Good. It will take about fifteen minutes to cook, and then I'll drive to your house.
**pause**
DirtyKate: I'm almost finished with my shower... Hurry up!
bloodninja: You can't hurry good pizza.
bloodninja: I'm on my way now though
**pause**
DirtyKate: So you're at my front door now.
bloodninja: How did you know?
bloodninja: I knock but you can't hear me cause you're in the shower. So I let myself in, and walk inside. I put the pizza down on your coffee table.
bloodninja: Are you ready to get nasty, baby? I'm as hot as a pizza oven
DirtyKate: Oooohh yeah. I step out of the shower and I'm all wet and cold. Warm me up baby
bloodninja: So you're still in the bathroom?
DirtyKate: Yeah, I'm wrapping a towel around myself.
bloodninja: I can no longer resist the pizza. I open the box and unzip my pants with my other hand. As I penetrate the gooey cheese, I moan in ecstacy. The mushrooms and Italian sausage are rough, but the sauce is deliciously soothing. I blow my load in seconds. As you leave the bathroom, I exit through the front door....
DirtyKate: What the f***?
DirtyKate: You perverted piece of shit
DirtyKate: f***

[Pgamblin]

Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?
Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and high heels. I work out every day, I'm toned and perfect. My measurements are 36-24-36. What do you look like?
Wellhung: I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds.I wear glasses and I have on a pair of blue sweat pants I just bought from Walmart.I'm also wearing a T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner...it smells funny.
Sweetheart: I want you.Would you like to screw me?
Wellhung: OK
Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom.There's soft music playing on the stereo and candles on my dresser and night table.I'm looking up into your eyes, smiling. My hand works its way down to your crotch and begins to fondle your huge, swelling bulge.
Wellhung: I'm gulping, I'm beginning to sweat.
Sweetheart: I'm pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest.
Wellhung: Now I'm unbuttoning your blouse.My hands are trembling.
Sweetheart: I'm moaning softly.
Wellhung: I'm taking hold of your blouse and sliding it off slowly.
Sweetheart: I'm throwing my head back in pleasure.The cool silk slides off my warm skin.I'm rubbing your bulge faster, pulling and rubbing.
Wellhung: My hand suddenly jerks spastically and accidentally rips a hole in your blouse.I'm sorry.
Sweetheart: That's OK, it wasn't really too expensive.
Wellhung: I'll pay for it.
Sweetheart: Don't worry about it.I'm wearing a lacy black bra. My soft breasts are rising and falling, as I breath harder and harder.
Wellhung: I'm fumbling with the clasp on your bra.I think it's stuck. Do you have any scissors?
Sweetheart: I take your hand and kiss it softly.I'm reaching back undoing the clasp. The bra slides off my body. The air caresses my breasts. My nipples are erect for you.
Wellhung: How did you do that? I'm picking up the bra and inspecting the clasp.
Sweetheart: I'm arching my back. Oh baby. I just want to feel your tongue all over me.
Wellhung: I'm dropping the bra. Now I'm licking your, you know, breasts. They're neat!
Sweetheart: I'm running my fingers through your hair. Now I'm nibbling your ear.
Wellhung: I suddenly sneeze. Your breasts are covered with spit and phlegm.
Sweetheart: What?
Wellhung: I'm so sorry. Really.
Sweetheart: I'm wiping your phlegm off my breasts with the remains of my blouse.
Wellhung: I'm taking the sopping wet blouse from you. I drop it with a plop.
Sweetheart: OK. I'm pulling your sweat pants down and rubbing your hard tool.
Wellhung: I'm screaming like a woman. Your hands are cold! Yeeee!
Sweetheart: I'm pulling up my miniskirt. Take off my panties.
Wellhung: I'm pulling off your panties. My tongue is going all over, in and out nibbling on you...umm... wait a minute.
Sweetheart: What's the matter?
Wellhung: I've got a pubic hair caught in my throat. I'm choking.
Sweetheart: Are you OK?
Wellhung: I'm having a coughing fit. I'm turning all red.
Sweetheart: Can I help?
Wellhung: I'm running to the kitchen, choking wildly. I'm fumbling through the cabinets, looking for a cup. Where do you keep your cups?
Sweetheart: In the cabinet to the right of the sink.
Wellhung: I'm drinking a cup of water. There, that's better.
Sweetheart: Come back to me, lover.
Wellhung: I'm washing the cup now.
Sweetheart: I'm on the bed arching for you.
Wellhung: I'm drying the cup. Now I'm putting it back in the cabinet. And now I'm walking back to the bedroom. Wait, it's dark, I'm lost. Where's the bedroom?
Sweetheart: Last door on the left at the end of the hall.
Wellhung: I found it.
Sweetheart: I'm tuggin' off your pants. I'm moaning. I want you so badly.
Wellhung: Me too.
Sweetheart: Your pants are off. I kiss you passionately-our naked bodies pressing each other.
Wellhung: Your face is pushing my glasses into my face. It hurts.
Sweetheart: Why don't you take off your glasses?
Wellhung: OK, but I can't see very well without them. I place the glasses on the night table.
Sweetheart: I'm bending over the bed. Give it to me, baby!
Wellhung: I have to pee. I'm fumbling my way blindly across the room and toward the bathroom.
Sweetheart: Hurry back, lover.
Wellhung: I find the bathroom and it's dark. I'm feeling around for the toilet. I lift the lid.
Sweetheart: I'm waiting eagerly for your return.
Wellhung: I'm done going. I'm feeling around for the flush handle, but I can't find it. Uh-oh!
Sweetheart: What's the matter now?
Wellhung: I've realized that I've peed into your laundry hamper. Sorry again. I'm walking back to the bedroom now, blindly feeling my way.
Sweetheart: Mmm, yes. Come on.
Wellhung: OK, now I'm going to put my...you know ...thing...in your...you know...woman's thing.
Sweetheart: Yes! Do it, baby! Do it!
Wellhung: I'm touching your smooth butt. It feels so nice. I kiss your neck. Umm, I'm having a little trouble here.
Sweetheart: I'm moving my ass back and forth, moaning. I can't stand it another second! Slide in! Screw me now!
Wellhung: I'm flaccid.
Sweetheart: What?
Wellhung: I'm limp. I can't sustain an erection.
Sweetheart: I'm standing up and turning around; an incredulous look on my face.
Wellhung: I'm shrugging with a sad look on my face, my weiner all floppy. I'm going to get my glasses and see what's wrong.
Sweetheart: No, never mind. I'm getting dressed. I'm putting on my underwear. Now I'm putting on my wet nasty blouse.
Wellhung: No wait! Now I'm squinting, trying to find the night table. I'm feeling along the dresser, knocking over cans of hair spray, picture frames and your candles.
Sweetheart: I'm buttoning my blouse. Now I'm putting on my shoes.
Wellhung: I've found my glasses. I'm putting them on. My God! One of our candles fell on the curtain. The curtain is on fire! I'm pointing at it, a shocked look on my face.
Sweetheart: Go to hell. I'm logging off, you loser!
Wellhung: Now the carpet is on fire! Oh noooo!
Sweetheart:

[ady]

I'm calling for a spanish inquisition into this thread. The noob that started it must think we're all stark raving mad!!!!!

suprise and fear............fear and surprise are TWOOOOOOO..........